This is something that I run across more and more often. Who am I… this is not me, I am not like this, I wasn’t like this before, who am I, where did I go.
We often struggle with the question, who am I. It starts very early in age, then it is am I mommies favorite, am I your friend, later it can progress to much stronger issues.
These are more simple questions, but some will linger in the mind and fester too, as some struggle more with who are they. Sexual orientation will often play into this search for who am I at an early age, and the struggles as you try to sort that out.
I will meet with someone and ask this, who are you…. sometimes, because of where we are when I ask, I will receive the answer, I am Becky and I am bipolar…. or many other things.
But that is not true. oh yes she may be Becky, she may struggle at times with bipolar disorder, she is not bipolar though, her struggles may define her, they may help to make her who she is, but they are not her, she is not it. But these are semantics, playing with words.
Often I will see someone ask me, who am i, this is not me. Today I spent most of the morning with someone that decided they did not want to be them any longer. I wanted their visit to the hospital to be their decision, I dislike forcing this visit on them as much as they dislike not having a choice… it would have gone this way if necessary, I am very convincing though, so we talked about the benefits to such a stay. We, of course also discussed the parts of the visit that would be not so nice, and what may and would follow such a visit, what their friends and family would think. This was good though as he was looking ahead now. He is struggling with who is he though.
who are you, who who.
Identity disorders make one struggle with this much more, who am I, but self esteem issues will make this struggle more difficult too. As we struggle to discover who we are, we can sometimes weaken ourselves, lower our self esteem and struggle more.
This occurs after divorce too, this struggle with who am i, before they were a team, now as a single entity, they are often unsure who they are.
Who we are is often a perception, are we skinny, are we hmm not. do we see ourselves as overweight and spend much time struggling with this.
who are you, an ever changing you, we are not the same as we were last year, we adapt and adjust, our self perception adjusts. most of the time.
It is really rather complex. I ask the question often though, because someones perception of who they are will indicate much toward where they want to be, and provide a path on how to get there, just from a three word question.