You know what to do
The stages, the feelings, you understand them, probably more than most others do.
You have experienced them, too often.
You understand how they vary.
How confusing they can be.
But you know this.
Anger, sadness, frustration… Migraines, powerful ones.
Sometimes laughing or smiling as you remember something.
Because memories are flying through your head at speeds even you are surprised at.
Memories you thought you had lost.
You hear their voice, you see their smile, you feel their hug.
And you cry again.
You try to be strong, because you know that they would want this.
They never liked to see you sad.
You can’t help it
even though you know
you remember the last visit you had with them
you wish there had been more
You compose poems in your mind.
Prose, praise, funny stories.
and then you cry
Sometimes you feel like your head is going to explode.
Migraines are like that.
Then you remember they had them too.
so many memories swimming by
awakening other memories, other losses.
You try to imagine them together now
Standing beside one another, watching you with a smile
And you bawl.
You know this will pass.
The pain will lessen.
fade away, replaced by the fond memories.
You will always feel them inside, you can peek there at them.
Now I will see the two of them, standing beside each other.
I know they missed each other.
They were very close.
But now it is hard.