Tag Archives: foster children

Too busy for dreams

 

Recently I read a blog post, where the author  had a dream. A dream of the day when her children would… well not be children, I am sure this is something often thought of by parents, when your child takes their plates from the table to the kitchen, hangs up their coat, does their homework, sorts their clothes in the laundry…. well manages to put them in the hamper.  Where you look in their room and it doesn’t look like a puppy was chasing a kitten for a few hours.  Children though, have a very busy schedule and there is often not time for all of these things. There may be a video game that is calling out, or a text to answer. A window to stare out of or a bike to ride. So these dreams are felt by many, I am sure.

I can see that day coming,  where it is a dream for me as well. Maybe.
 
Right now I smile when I see the socks trying to escape the room all by themselves, or the three shoes by the door.. where is the other one?… toothpaste that they promised they put on the toothbrush.. but is on the counter instead or as well?  hmm.
 
Now though, this is all a sign of normalization for me, to see these signs of a child that has a busy schedule. For me this means that our two little ones are acclimating to their abrupt change of life.  That they are not living on eggshells, afraid to do anything wrong in fear of being “sent away”. That they are feeling more  that this is their home now.  They belong.  Then again, it is new for us as well, the sudden onslaught of two little ones in our lives, so these things are a part of it, and sometimes we giggle when we see a tiny hand print on the window or the  tap… still running. I am sure that it won’t take long though, before exasperation replaces giggles. Maybe. 
 
Right now these are good signs. They do try, how long that will last though, I wonder.  They want to impress us, maybe it will form habits? That will last? It will be interesting to see. They see how we do things and are eager to copy, they want things to be right, because they want to stay. There is that fear. We are working all the time to replace that fear with comfort, they are starting to get it. They are starting to understand that they need have no fear of being sent away, they are a part of us now. It is happening, this realization. 
 
We are living on eggshells as well, trying to anticipate foods they will like, when they say blech, it is ok we are learning from each other, avoiding scolding. All that will come, in time. Now we try to show how we do things, ask if they think it is a good way to do something, watch when their little faces scrunch up as they ponder that. We are learning too, I am still sort of sure socks don’t come in packs of three… but I could be mistaken. Maybe it is magic, elves like socks, I remember that from Harry Potter. 
 
Right now I love when I call out… did you brush your teeth and they go ahhhhhhhhhhh. But they go back and do it.   But mommy I was in a hurry.
 
 See? Busy.
 
Our Little girl turned five, we had a series of parties on the weekend. We do celebrate birthdays in a big way, it is our family thing, usually three parties, one for the four of us, now six, one for friends and one for family, the ones that don’t live with us lol. So both of our little ones have seen the party weekends now as they both have had their series of parties. Parties with us. With their new friends and with their new family. Aunts and uncles, cousins and grandparents, they have great grand parents now too. They are skyping with their grandparents, sometimes they have two laptops open and two conversations going.  Often a few times a day, it is cute to watch. The grandparents are giving away secrets though. lol.
 
See? too busy to find that missing sock.
 
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