equal rights

What is Marriage? At the time of this pages creation this was, and I am sure still is a hotly debated topic.

Marriage, some argue is intertwined in religion. This is true, perhaps with your religion. Religion and beliefs are personal. You are entitled to follow which ever path you wish. Telling others to follow your path or quoting your beliefs, expecting others to follow them, however, is just wrong.

Religion does not own the word marriage. Marriage is defined as a union. That is it. Trees growing together become intertwined, the term used is they marry.

Marriage gives the couple rights. All married couples. Yes same sex couples. Rights that may not be available to them in some countries. I am proud to be Canadian, where we have moved past this issue. At the time I created this page, Canada was one of eleven nations that legalized same sex marriage.

So for people fighting this issue in their minds, and more vocally in other countries… 

Lets go slow. Lift your mind and think. You may say fine they can live together in a union but not call it marriage. Perhaps even create some other name to differentiate it.

So we have two issues. One the word marriage and two the rights of a married couple.

Imagine living with someone you love with all your heart. One day they are in a traffic accident. You are denied the right to see them as visitation is for family only. How could this possibly be justified?

I am not going to visit monetary issues or rights associated with this now.

Rights should be a given, I don’t think this is really being argued, if it is, then it sickens me to think that it is. Visitation rights in a hospital, the rights a spouse would have, final say rights and all the other legal rights that exist. They are a given, there should be no consideration about this. None.

More issue seems to be about using the word marriage.

So we go back to …. it is against my religion. Fine, then don’t get married. What you do does not concern me. What others do should not concern you. You can not quote from any source how marriage is against religion. Perhaps the couple wishes a civil union, a civil non religious marriage. Perhaps their religion accepts their beliefs. YOU have no say in someone else’s beliefs, only your own.

I have seen articles where some argue that a same sex marriage demeans or dirties their marriage. They cringe at the thought of perhaps being grouped with this? Somehow it cheapens your marriage?  Many argue that God is against this, but then we are back to your religion Your beliefs and religion does not own the word. Your beliefs are yours and you are entitled to them, you have no right to inflict them on others. Think about this. I have somewhat of a more difficult time with this. Is your religion not forgiving? Understanding? Compassionate? 

Homophobic responses are strong in some. Many ride the righteous wave of indignation at the thought of same sex couples.

Until their son or daughter quietly walks into the room trembling, tears glistening on their cheeks and “comes out”.

Or their niece or nephew, or brother or sister, friend, cousin, shares their news.

Sometimes this changes things, their love for them overpowers their previous contempt. They change when they see that the love that their loved ones share with their partner is just as magical as their own may be.

Sometimes though it doesn’t. This is sad. They may shun, ignore, evict. The family is torn apart.

This makes me ponder, was there any love to start with?

How could there be? It is sad to think that someones belief can be stronger than their love for the person. So strong that rather than acceptance… there is shunning. Disowning. 

But back to the topic. The word marriage. It is a union. Two people in love form a union. So should they all be entitled to the word marriage? Yes!

When I hear some say no that this dirties, cheapens my marriage… I am saddened. Perhaps all same sex couples should be gathered up and sent to a leper like colony? or maybe you are in favour of genocide?

Too brutal? Insulting? Ridiculous? Your solution is to allow the unions but not the use of the word. Call it something else. This will not dirty the word for you. Sorry but this is segregation isn’t it? Have we not moved past that?

What then is the solution?

Asking that is the problem. There is no solution as there is no problem. MARRIAGE IS A UNION.

Embrace humanity. Accept. You are not being invited to join their union, their marriage. Humanity does not need conflict, only love.

I know this is too simple.

that it is more complex.

pssssst.   NO IT IS NOT.


8 responses »

  1. I like this ber. 🙂

  2. I love it!

  3. I love it too. 🙂

  4. *raises my hand in agreement*

  5. When I ‘came out’, family and friends were horrified. Mum couldn’t fathom whether to be more worried about what other people thought or the fact I would now burn in hell. Back then, we never thought we would see the day when gay marriage was being discussed, let alone made legal.

    The UK parliament first introduced the same sex union, ‘Civil Partnership’. It was marriage in all but name. When they were considering changing the name from Civil Partnership to Marriage, I had debates with different people. I’ll never forget old Nelly, passionately against same sex couples being allowed to “marry”. “Marriage is sacred between man and woman” she said

    A few weeks later, I met old Nelly, excited to share her news

    “I’m going to a wedding on Saturday… it’s one of those gay marriages…. What d’ya call them?”

    I’m sure there are many old Nelly’s out there… a little proof that it is only a name.

  6. When coming to terms with gender identity, desires and feelings, it can be traumatic enough, discovering that you are not, what is often, considered “normal” ( a word I dislike ), this trauma become consuming, or can be in most environments. I hope, in the future this is less so, we seem to be slowly moving in that direction. To remove the stigma from this too, can help so much with what that “stigma” does to a young mind coming to terms with things.

    I wrote this post, when it was being discussed, to ‘allow’ the union but keep the word ‘marriage’ out of it. Perhaps you can sense that it raised something in me at the time. 🙂

    Slowly, I think we are moving forward in thinking, it is snowballing though.

  7. darkravengirl13

    No it is not that complex. Love is love.


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